Feeling kind of sad now..and the worse thing is I can't explain it. Everyone's mugging away..and I'm still here wasting my time. And I was just thinking about the past..where I've made many mistakes..missed many opportunities..made many wrong decisions......oh boy..I really have the sudden urge to relive the past. Perhaps I'll fare better the second time.

I'm feeling philosophical now..as usual. I was just wondering..what is it in this big world that can make me smile. At times when I laugh..I wonder if it's coming from my heart. Somehow..I just lost the momentum to go on. And my walk with God hasn't been good. Life seems stagnant now. hHm......

So many things that don't go the way I want it to be. So many emotions that are felt involuntarily. It just happens that I recalled many unhappy memories..plus my present pathetic state (trying to force myself to study) and that's the reason why I'm feeling down. I suddenly feel like listening to Have You Ever by S Club 7..

Sometimes it's wrong to walk away
Though you think it's over
Knowing there's so much more to say
Suddenly the moment's gone
And all your dreams are upside down
You just want to change the way the world goes round

Tell me, have you ever loved and lost somebody
Wished there was a chance to say I'm sorry
Can't you see, that's the way I feel about you and me
Have you ever felt your heart was breaking
Looking down the road you should be taking
I should know
Cause I loved and lost the day I let you go

Can't help but think that this is wrong
We should be together
Back in your arms where I belong
Now I finally realise
It was forever that I found
I gave it all to change the way the world goes round

I really want to hear you say
That you know just how it feels
To have it all let it slip away
Can't you see
Even though the moment's gone
I'm still holding on somehow
Wishing I could change the way the world goes round

It doesn't only apply to relationships. I guess my screw just came loose. Oh gosh I can feel my heart breaking whenever I think about sad things. As in...really feel my heart aching. This is bad. Brain-wash: you'll get better tomorrow. Do try to spread some of your joy to me..good nite to the big big world~